Chibi,
Do you have an address for your fan club? I would like to join.
Whiskers
Whiskers,
Just email chibidpug@rocketmail.com. I get mail almost every day! You have already joined!
Chibi,
I recently discovered how to make my owner do a trick! I thought I would share it with you. When my human leaves the room, I assume a position right near where they were, but hidden. Sometimes I will go behind the door, or under a blanket. When they return, I wait until they are occupied and not thinking about me. Then in my most ferocious bark, I leap out. Almost every time, their eyes will grow wide and they will leap a few inches. It’s amazing. I thought you might want o try this with your highly favored one and see if you can teach her that trick.
Macy Mutt
Dear Macy Mutt,
It's wonderful that you taught your humans a trick; and I respect your boldness. I hope I can re-use the trick sometime close in the future. Thank-you.
Sincerely,
Chibi
Chibi,
Do you have any advice for me? I am going to wed my long-time companion. Is there a protocol for canine weddings? IS it wrong to have a cat as best man? Is it in poor taste to sniff other dog heinies once you are married? There is so much we need to know!
Thank you in advance.
Sharla and Sam (soon to be Shepherd
Dear Sharla and Sam,
Congratulations! Marriage is a wonderful thing. I am prepared to answer all of your questions.
Start the wedding with the very traditional music. I suggest " Can You Feel the Pug Tonight". Or, even better, "All You Need is Pugs". Wear a beautiful veil. Walk down the aisle and smile. When you get to the platform, look straight at the Preacher. That is his cue to start the speech. The best man can be a cat, and the MOH can be a gerbil. No matter what the species, they will be accepted. You can sniff other dogs' heinies once you are married, but only in the presence of your groom. It is considered improper otherwise. I recommend the collar-bearer to have a rhinestone studded collar for you, and a leather collar for your groom. Enjoy the marries life!
Best Wishes,
Chibi
As I read your column, I am inspired by your liberal admission of accepting cats as – apparently- equals. How did you come to this conclusion, and is there anything I can do to can do to persuade the canines of my household that I am a force to be reckoned with.
Dear Dr. Chibi,
Why does my highly favored one continue filling food bowl with dry, tasteless kibble. Last week, he fed me a piece of something called bacon, and the only way I could think to show him how much I liked was to puke it up and eat it again. I don’t think he understood what I was trying to say. You are my only hope.
A. Jean Beagle
Dear Jean,
I, too, have suffered from bad dog food. But this answer is so simple I'm surprised you haven't figured it on your own! Simply don't eat the food that you don't like. Your human no doubt loves you and wants what is best for you. So he/she will eventually figure out that the dog food he is currently feeding you is in the "not good" column. By the way, it's best not to throw up your food when it's something tasty, because then they will think that bacon makes you sick. Don't worry though! There are lots of other treats, too.
Yours truly,
Chibi
Dear Ms. Pug,
My chosen one will not let me sleep in her bed. She insists that I sleep in a soft round container at the end of her bed. What do I need to do to convince her that I need to share her bed for her to keep ‘chosen one’ status?
Respectfully,